Friday, December 12, 2003

It might take a while before I get to the final Scorsese film in our series of reviews. By "a while" I mean like a week. I had in mind to do them all consecutively in chronological order, but then I was at the library and found two other films that I wanted to see.
This morning was the usual blur of shipping and stocking that these holiday weeks have become. People continue to order books. It's like I'm collecting a tax on foolishness.
Today got a little heavy in the middle. A little on the "dwelling on things" ish side of me.
Then I got Chinese food for dinner that made my insides feel like a cat sleeping in front of a fire.
Tonight I went to Zany Brainy, which is going out of business. Dude behind the counter said that all Zany Brainy stores are going under. Education/creativity can't compete with pre-fab giant chains. Not that Zany Brainy isn't a giant corporate chain. They just focused on a cooler class of toy. And they had cheap day-glo paint that I used to buy a lot. So, the bad news is that soon we will have to make do with Imaginarium. The good news is that Zany Brainy is cutting back prices to 1997. So get while the gettin's good.
I came home and read. Savoring the Nick Cave book I am. I'll probably finish it tomorrow and I really don't want to. I don't want it to end.

Today I was thinking about Lucifer. I got that card at the womanspirit fair the other day and I've been reading Mike Carey's astoundingly good series of graphic novels on Lucifer. One of the important points about Lucifer is that he is never connected directly in the Bible to Satan or The Snake in Genesis. Theologians have found this difficult and, in my opinion, solve the problem by making them all one character. Suddenly Lucifer, Satan and the Snake in Genesis get put under a big blanket with "The Devil" written on it.
The story goes, culled from bits of the Bible and a straightforward extrapolated narrative from Milton, Lucifer was the most beautiful being ever created. God's favorite. Then Lucifer decided that he wanted more power, to be an equal with God or a creator. This would not do. So God threw Lucifer out of Heaven along with those who sympathized with Lucifer.
I think about the story of Lucifer and what occurs to me is that Lucifer's number one trait is Free Will. I don't think the point is that Will is bad by definition. I think it's an illustration of how Will leading us beyond our powers can end in great pain. So Will could sometimes be the shadow aspect of Faith. Or, rather, as most of the good theologians (i.e. any theologian I'd ever want to listen to) would tell you, the answer probably isn't in blacks and whites, but in the balance of the two. To have Will without Faith is nothing more than an overinflated self importance. Faith without Will can keep you from acheiving any forward motion in your personal life.
What I get from it is to beware of "either/or" world views.
As a side crackpot hypothesis here, maybe this is why the stupid often call Aleister Crowley a Satanist, even though he didn't really believe in Satan. His whole spiritual walk revolved around finding the true will and following that.
In short, I'm not going to win Survivor on just faith or just will, but by a mixture of the two. Plus being enough of a character that the producers don't let me get voted off right away.


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